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Empty Boxes

by Andrew DiRemiggio Stoltz

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about

Empty Boxes has personal origins.

I am adopted. I have always known so as my mother was open about this with my sister and I while we were growing up. It was simply part of my story. It was a fortunate turn for me, since my parents were caring, generous people who loved raising and providing for their children. I had everything I needed, much of what I wanted and the encouragement to follow my ambitions. My mother told me what she knew and always maintained that if I ever wanted more information about my origins, she would help in any way possible. For most of my life I was content to know I could get more information if I wanted.

When my parents passed away and I experienced that peculiar feeling of being orphaned, I started thinking about my biological roots, specifically medical history. I came to learn that the State of Ohio was opening previously locked records to adoptees between the years 1964-1994. After some deliberation I took the bait, paid my $20 fee and requested my original birth certificate. While I did consider the ramifications, I don’t think I was quite prepared for the impact that such a document would have on me. Seeing a different name, address and other personal information about myself and my birth mother was moving, interesting and even confusing. Like having two completely different identities. I felt both fascinated and guilty, as if digging this deep was a betrayal of my wonderful parents who gave so much to me. But there was also something poetic about seeing so much profound personal information crammed into a bleak-looking government form.

My investigations led me to some compelling, surprising and disappointing conclusions. Unfortunately, my birth mother had passed away in the late 1990s at a relatively young age. This was a blow I had not expected or considered. She was the one person who could have answered most of my questions and I wanted the opportunity to thank her for making the decision that resulted in me having a fortunate childhood. But the opportunity for that moment has passed and coming to terms with that was difficult.

The text for Empty Boxes (by the composer) is inspired by information both provided and excluded from my original birth certificate. One door opens, another closes. The incomplete boxes have left me with more questions than answers.

lyrics

With Silver nitrate in my eyes I cannot see her.

134-68-012953

The box is empty. The box is blank.
 She was twenty.
 They called her obese.

Was she sad?
 Was she ashamed? Did he die?
 Did he leave?


The box is blank.

credits

released September 1, 2017
Quince Ensemble:
Carrie Henneman-Shaw-Soprano
Liz Pearse-Soprano
Kayleigh Butcher-Mezzo-Soprano

Andrew Stoltz-The Owl, Chimes
Travis Weller - Vibraphone, bass drum
Elizabeth Lee-Cello

*Recorded, mixed and mastered by Andrew Stoltz

For a beautifully designed CD and the other pieces from The Austin New Music Co-op/Quince Ensembles's "Scenes and Lines", follow this link:
willow.st/scenesandlines/

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Andrew DiRemiggio Stoltz Austin, Texas

Andrew DiRemiggio Stoltz is an Austin, Texas-based composer, performer and recording engineer. Utilizing traditional and non-traditional instruments, composition and improvisation, his work celebrates the subtle, meditative and quiet moments.

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